The electric interplay between the human brain & body is infinitely fascinating. Understatement of the eon, right?
As grown-ups, we often get stuck in comfy pathways — some productive, some less so. We butter our toast. We shake hands. We say “sorry.” We part our hair. We straighten our pillows. We tuck in our sheets.
Nothing wrong with healthy habits — especially when they spiral us closer to our goals — but sometimes a radical thought experiment can trigger creative lava flows, bust ruts, crush stagnation, and elevate the experience of moving through life to something approaching…art.
I’ve completed all 5 of these brain-body experiments — without scorching off my eyebrows, or alienating my friends. No goggles, beakers or lab coats required.
1. Tell A Story — Without Using A Single Adjective.
I’m notorious for peppering stories with florid, overblown descriptors. Once, my brother challenged me to tell a story — without using a single adjective. What emerged from my lips was a cross between cave man dialect and agonized sputtering. It was physically painful. And hilarious. I could practically feel fresh folds & grooves forming in my gray matter, like when you study a foreign language.
2. 24 Hours of Total Truth
At my last cubicle job, I found myself sinking into the habit of using softcore, passive-aggressive, creepy-corporate, overly-sensitive language in my daily interactions — and it was harshing my mellow, man. To break the cycle, I committed to 24 Hours of Total Truth. If someone asked me how a project was going (and it was going badly) I would say, “badly.” If someone asked me how I was feeling (and I was exhausted) I would say, “exhausted.” If someone asked me how the training session went (and it was mediocre) I would say, “mediocre.” It was pretty liberating. And guess what? Nobody’s feelings got hurt. Most people laughed, and thanked me for my honesty.
3. Double-Up On Physical Contact
The Internet once told me that human beings need a minimum of 7 hugs per day, for maximum radiance, happiness and immune system vitality. I believe the Internet. And I’ve gone through hug-less periods of life — and felt the grotesque effects.
So slather on your Old Spice, ask permission (it’s easy: “may I hug you?”) and crank the hug-o-meter up to 11 — for a day, a week, or a lifetime.
Bonus round: cuddling. With your partner, with your (willing) BFF, with total strangers at a structured cuddling event (they exist). It’s like hugging, but horizontally!
4. Eradicate Small Talk
“How ’bout this weather?” “How ’bout those Vikings?” Unless flaming balls of tar are raining from the sky — and unless Norwegian warriors are ransacking your village — eradicate these phrases from your lexicon. They’re mindless filler. Waste of breath. Waste of earspace.
Instead, sit in silence. Revel in the awkwardness. After a few heartbeats, the awkwardness will vaporize, and it’ll just feel…serene.
Or, if you simply must flap your trap, ask a dynamic question. Try, “tell me about your first kiss.” Or, “what’s your earliest childhood memory?” Or, “do you have a totem animal?” Or, “do you have any recurring dreams?” See what unfurls when the convo gets kooky.
5. Say “I’m Back!”
One last nugget of highly-applicable wisdom from Marie Forleo’s Rich, Happy & Hot conference — if you feel yourself drifting away from the present moment (thinking about your grocery list, your bunion appointment, the lint stuck in your pocket) aggressively pull yourself into the present by declaring (out loud) “I’M BACK!”
You might frighten a few folks — but godammit, it works!
All right, mad scientists. Play safe…and feel free to share your laboratory findings!
Sweet post!!!!! I consider my entire life an experiment, so I am so down with this! Yesterday I tried this out – on my lunch break I went to the park, took a long walk, meandered off the path and laid down on the leaves (yes, with nothing between me and the ground) in my business clothes and took a nap. OMG, it felt so incredible! Like 10 spa days in the span of 15 minutes. Liberating, relaxing, and different. Awwwwwwwww.
I love these suggestions.
-Kristen
1.) I love the new blog design/layout! It’s so much easier to read and all-around awesome.
2.) I like #3. Hugs do feel nice. Especially as someone who lives in a city where even eye-contact is often avoided. My roommate better watch out later! Spontaneous hug time.
I love #2 especially; I tend to err on the side of white lies in an attempt to make others comfortable and I’d like to stop doing that. I’ll have to give it a go!
PS: By the way, this post didn’t show up in my RSS reader until today, even though you posted it on the first. Just thought you might want to know in case you wanted to check that out.
Hi Alexandra!
I particularly love #4 Eradicate Small Talk. It is truly such a waste, and so easy to fall into! I’m going to try becoming more aware of how often I fall into it, and try eliminating it and see what happens. I’m not looking forward to the awkwardness of silence – but I’ll do my best to embrace and sit with that awkwardness, instead of being awkward about it. :P
Loved these tips! :)
I just tried the “I’m Back!” thing. By golly, it really works!
I need to know first if hugs covers hugging your pets. If that’s true than I’m more than covered and my pets probably wish I’d go to Pet Hugger Anonymous PHA.
But I need to do the opposite of #1. I’ve got the cave man down pat and most of my adjectives have to do with whips, stripper poles and provocative 13 year old boy talk, but perhaps if you could provide us with the Alexandra Franzen’s guide to Supercharged Adjectives it would be super duper helpful.
Thanks!
LOVE the new layout and I adore these suggestions. I practice #2 & #5 quite a bit and I have been thanked for the honesty. I actually enjoy sitting in silence (maybe public transportation has given me that gift LOL) but I am now dying to ask a random, dynamic question to someone =D
KRISTEN :: 10 spa days in the span of 15 minutes…sounds marvelous. Keep onnnn trucking’!
TATIANA :: I’m sure your roommate won’t mind a spastic hug-attack. Just keep it above the waist. And choose a safe word.
MICHELLE :: White lies are bootleg. If you’re gonna lie, it might as well be a rip-roaring, fanciful fallacy! Like, with inter-stellar travel and dragons and stuff!
JESS WEBB :: Sit with the awkwardness. It’ll pass. And you’ll (both) survive.
TARA MELISSA :: Hell yeah! It’s magic.
ERIKA LYREMARK :: I recommend Thesaurus.com. Seriously. It’s permanently open in my browser…
RACHAEL :: I bet you can whip up a helluva dynamo question. Pop it!
I love the little ideas like this I find on your blog! I love hugs, and I think I give that many per day anyway, does this mean I should double that again to 20 or so? Ha.
I will definitely try #2 and would love to try #4 but I’m SCARED! I feel like most people would think I was a crazy person if we sat there in silence for a couple minutes and then I asked them to tell me about their first kiss!
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