Not a tremendous amount of bilious hatred today. Just a couple things on my list, namely:

{ The douchebucket on CNBC who hosts “Mad Money.” I was forced to watch the show while using the elliptical trainer at my gym (the TV was positioned directly in front of my face) and even with the sound off I found it unnerving and agitating. }

{ Dry skin! Ugh. I have yet to find a non-greasy-yet-effective moisturizer to soothe my chapped epidermis. Any recommendations? }

{ Consistently getting to the office at 9:30 am or later. My boss / coworkers don’t really care, and I always get my work done on time, but it means that I have to stay past 5 pm to put in a full 8 hours … which makes for a very long day (at least psychologically). }

{ When you spread cold cream cheese onto a toasted bagel and it melts away, leaving a transparent scum. Thanks, Anna, for reminding me how much I hate this! You’re a true friend. }

{ Myself, for not discovering Balkan Beat Box sooner. Hip hop + Israeli klezmer music = raunchy beats with a powerful message: peace in the Middle East. Total gypsy-punk genius. But what else would you expect from former-Gogol Bordello member Ori Kaplan? }

Honorary Hatred Mentions:

{ Broken zippers. }

{ Smudgy wine glasses. }

{ Unproductively fretting about things left undone. }

{ Not having enough time to thoroughly peruse my precious New York Times in a leisurely fashion each morning. }

{ Wearing a leotard, and needing to pee. }

{ The uninvited reappearance of animal print clothing. GO. AWAY. LEOPARD. SPOTS. }

{ Restaurants that trick you into thinking they serve brunch on Saturdays (cough cough Happy Gnome!) when in actuality they do NOT. Deceitful knavery! }

(Photo via The Denver Post)